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Convention Community => Off-Topic => Topic started by: MichaelEvans on February 08, 2008, 09:35:09 pm
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I know what I think I'm doing and trying to do. What may be important though is what others think I'm trying to do and how they feel about me.
Please, be honest, do not hold back or be nice at all. The best thing you can do is tell me the truth, as you see it.
I think at the moment I may be spending too much time reflecting on how to improve things around me, and once again neglecting how I fit in to it, so I really need this as a sanity check and recalibration.
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...wait what? ???
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you should spend more time working reflecting on who you are and what you want to be. Once you have realized exactly who you are, and what you want to be then aim to correct that which are find to be at fault. Meditation and tea can be the start of a wonderful existence. Do some breathing excersizes first. This isnt something you can do instantly, most important thing when trying to improve yourself is to be patient with yourself.
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Did you break the server? tsk tsk
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Wouldn't this be one of those unfortunate things like, "If we don't notice you, it means you're doing a good job"?
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Michael, I don't know the first thing about you. Buy me a beer and I may start to like you!
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Thank you for all the replies so far. I hope I can redeem my self in the eyes of whomever currently thinks that I'm getting in the way. I also hope that some of the items towards the end of the projects I want to work on this year make it easier for others to understand if not exactly what I do, the results of it.
I suppose I should probably also answer any reasonable question asked of me, since I made this area to help me determine if I were trying to help in the wrong ways or if communication alone was faulty. I don't think I'll be offended by anything asked in a reasonable way (an example of something not reasonable to ask: When did you stop making the servers die?).
Speaking of the server going down... that ticked me off as well. I think it was just our provider doing stuff to it or the database though. I've not been given a login shell yet this year, so I have no way of troubleshooting such things at this time.
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When giving someone advice or making suggestions, make sure things are stated in such a way that the don't read the same way as a demand. You can't read tone of voice very well so word choice is even more important.
Voicing suggestions as requests is even better.
Give people a chance to change and respond at their own pace. I have found that things with the convention take about a week. If they happen sooner that's great, they were probably already done. If nothing happens in more than a week then it's time to check again, and probably with more than one person. A week tends to be the time it takes someone to read an email or post, confer with their resources, and then find the time to reply properly. Not all of us are lucky enough to be able to hop onto the forums and converse during our work hours. 8)
Finally, try and learn the art of interpretation. That is, read between the lines when a person says something or responds. Sometimes the person could be trying to make a suggestion to you without coming out and saying something specific, other times they might not want to be confrontational about something.
As an example, in our recent back and forth about the hotel map I was working on, you made your first set of suggestions and I responded. In your first response you came across as demanding and self righteous, it sounded like you were trying to boss me into following your instructions. My first reply was a polite way of telling you to back off and not use that tone of voice with me. As the conversation went on I had to be more blunt until you got the message.
I know that you're a smart guy and really know your stuff when it comes to computers, but bless your heart you've got to know when to bite your tongue and wait for a person to ask for your expertise.
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Don't sweat the small stuff. Details is a magazine, not a way to make friends and influence people.
Let others impress you with what they know.
Practice listening, not just hearing.
Remove all unnecessary verbiage, when speaking to others.
Keep It Simple Stupid! (K.I.S.S.)