First Impressions

[nikkiolie]

I was just thinking about something, and I realized I have a lot of first impressions of a lot of people on this forum. We were talking in my psychology class that is only takes 4 seconds of someone talking to make a first impression. Here I have been on this forum for almost a year and there are some impressions that I just can get over.

Some people that I like no matter what they do and some people that I dislike no matter what they do. I'm curious if anyone else is in the same boat as me. I am even more curious to hear some of the first impressions people have on others but that could lead to some serious drama.

So what are some of your experiences with first impressions and how did you overcome them (if you did)?

[makichan]

I make a lot of first impressions on here, but the more I get to know certain people, the more those opinions change (either good or bad).
I don't want to name specific examples because I don't want things to get misinterpreted.
There are certain people that rub me the wrong way, but I try to give everyone a chance.
Some impressions are hard to get rid of though, if they're proven true in most cases. 
lol

[EveofAbyss]

Well, from my side I tend to get positive first impressions from a lot of people I meet from the forums. I think my problem is the other side, how I come off to people I meet. I've never heard much (beside the occasional "he's scary and intimidating" comment) about me negatively, but I tend to not interact with many people after I meet them the first time, so I don't know if I am just coming off as a jerk or what, but I think I may be doing something wrong, lol.

But I definitely am getting good impressions from other people. You all seem pretty chill, haha (and I know some of you well enough to know you're good people, heh).

[xxxchihiroxxx]

I dont get to many impressions at first, but there are some people that after talkingfor a little bit I get this feeling, itcan go good or bad, ussualy theirgood, but not all the time, though i tend to find my intution is pretty good.... I dont think I personaly give the best impression all the time... I tend to come off as a bit hyper and dont ussualy take the hint, but i try to be gnerally nice.

[Negima]

I tend to get an impression on people fairly quick but I try to leave some space to change my mind.  There were some neighbors of mine that I wasn't too happy with but when I actually sat down and hung out with them a little, they turned out to be really cool.

As far as I can tell here on the forum, almost everyone thinks I'm a girl.  Why?  I don't know.

[TanisNikana]

I tend to leave people with a very negative first impression.

[Auricle]

I tend to like most people on first impression, but my opinion can be subject to change. I haven't really had any bad first impressions, though. :3

However, I seriously worry over how I'm coming off to other people and whether or not I'm having perception issues with how I'm actually acting. @_@

[laurifer]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

[Trumby]

Well, from my side I tend to get positive first impressions from a lot of people I meet from the forums. I think my problem is the other side, how I come off to people I meet. I've never heard much (beside the occasional "he's scary and intimidating" comment) about me negatively, but I tend to not interact with many people after I meet them the first time, so I don't know if I am just coming off as a jerk or what, but I think I may be doing something wrong, lol.

I'm the same way (except I don't think I am scary and intimidating..lawl)...plus I am really quiet in person, at least until I get to know someone enough, then I'm not. I don't think I've really gotten any bad first impressions off anyone here on the forums. Plus I've barely actually met any of you in person. I try to reserve judgement until I've actually met people in person, as things can be pretty skewed online from how the person actually is in real life.

[EveofAbyss]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

I thought you were awesome the first time I met you, so that's at least one that you didn't screw up. ^_^

[laurifer]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

I thought you were awesome the first time I met you, so that's at least one that you didn't screw up. ^_^

I'm glad haha and I wasn't intimidated the first time I saw you...you are awesome *high five*

[EveofAbyss]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

I thought you were awesome the first time I met you, so that's at least one that you didn't screw up. ^_^

I'm glad haha and I wasn't intimidated the first time I saw you...you are awesome *high five*

*high five* Yay, haha. Well, I'm glad that impression isn't the one I give all the time.

[Teasel]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

You're not the only one.

[MiriaRose]

However, I seriously worry over how I'm coming off to other people

^ This.

I'm constantly paranoid everyone hates me. >.<

I generally have good first impressions of people, but that changes sometimes once I get to know people better. ^^

[makichan]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

Pfft, whatever xD
You're a really neat gal. We need to chill more!

@Eve
My first impression of you was that you were quiet but had a really good sense of humor ^^

[EveofAbyss]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

Pfft, whatever xD
You're a really neat gal. We need to chill more!

@Eve
My first impression of you was that you were quiet but had a really good sense of humor ^^

Thanks, haha. Yeah, I am working on being more open and extroverted in group situations. ^_^

[laurifer]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

Pfft, whatever xD
You're a really neat gal. We need to chill more!

@Eve
My first impression of you was that you were quiet but had a really good sense of humor ^^

Awwww thanks o^__^o we should most def chill after all this school bs starts winding down lol

[makichan]

I usually screw up my first impression XD

Pfft, whatever xD
You're a really neat gal. We need to chill more!

@Eve
My first impression of you was that you were quiet but had a really good sense of humor ^^

Thanks, haha. Yeah, I am working on being more open and extroverted in group situations. ^_^

I have this weird condition of telling complete strangers the most intimate details of my life. It's a horrible habit lol.
Whenever there are forum meet ups though, I'm always a tinsy bit nervous that I'll make a complete ass of myself 9__9

@Laurifer
Yesss~ ^o^

[Sayda]

I'm pretty sure I come off to some people as an ass. I have an odd sense of humor, and don't really tollerate immaturity well.

As for other people, I can usually tell if I'm going to like them or not pretty quickly. Most of the time it's based on how they look, surprisingly. Sometimes though, I'm not sure, but once they speak to me for a bit, I can decide then.

[TanisNikana]

Yeah, I piss off a lot of people with how I type.

[jaybug]

I feel like I am the exception to the rule here. You may talk to me here, but if you actually saw me in person?  lol So sometimes we have to remember who someone is from where we met them, and that unless they are a most excellent actor, they are probably a lot like they are here in the forum.

For me, I try not to have first impressions, as they seem to be negative. Unless that impression is egregiously bad. Then I will let that one fly. People are people, no matter how small, old, sex, color, etc.

Rarely, someone wows me. But then how many people do I wow? Darn few.

Then there's Tanis. lol

[ishpumalibu]

I love this post, psych is awesome.


I don't really judge people, in fact I tend to get along with people well even if others don't. I can definately be rough on people when they've shown me they don't deserve repect though.

I tend to get along with everyone, but I'm always wondering when the other shoe will drop so to speak. I'd rather just have people say what they actually think of me, I don't like underhandedness. It reminds me of girls who don't just say no when you ask them out and instead make something up, or give a fake number. Fakeness is so lame.

[NightLotus]

I know for a fact that I am extremely hard to like, especially when it comes to first impressions. I know i probably could change this, but i've been so discouraged that people still dislike me so much that over the years that I've stopped trying.

I do always look for the best in people. and If i instinctively don't like someone, i talk to them and try to find out why, I don't like being rude for no reason. but if i truly don't like them, then i loose a lot of my inhibitions with being rude.

[laurifer]

I'm pretty sure I come off to some people as an ass. I have an odd sense of humor, and don't really tollerate immaturity well.

As for other people, I can usually tell if I'm going to like them or not pretty quickly. Most of the time it's based on how they look, surprisingly. Sometimes though, I'm not sure, but once they speak to me for a bit, I can decide then.

You didn't come off as an ass when I first met you :]

Fakeness is so lame.

QFT

[Syd-chan]

xD I usually mess up the first impression and spend the next few weeks running the events through my mind and thinking about what I should have done. As for first impressions of other people? ...Well, I always try to think that someone might just be having an off day, and they're not really that horrible or something. o.o So, I kind of try to bring out the best in people. Or rather, assume that what I saw wasn't. As for certain people....Well, rarely I just "click" with a couple people. :/

[RandomCosplay]

I tend not to care on 1st impressions I go by you know just because some one rubbed you wrong you also have to realize some people don't mean to I know I made a lot of you mad but I honestly did not mean to all I ever asked was meet me in person other then the forums then make up your mind

[Stevie]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

[RandomCosplay]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

that's what I'm saying I had every one get on my case left and right for what I did like last year and people still give me the down side of it now people get on me about my spelling and grammar honistly I'm a person if heres no dot in place if your smart youll know what im talking about

[Stevie]

A few years of Role Playing will get you into the habit. XD

[TanisNikana]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

that's what I'm saying I had every one get on my case left and right for what I did like last year and people still give me the down side of it now people get on me about my spelling and grammar honistly I'm a person if heres no dot in place if your smart youll know what im talking about

You should improve your spelling and grammar.

[RandomCosplay]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

that's what I'm saying I had every one get on my case left and right for what I did like last year and people still give me the down side of it now people get on me about my spelling and grammar honistly I'm a person if heres no dot in place if your smart youll know what im talking about

You should improve your spelling and grammar.

I am working on it! for the fact of not hearing people get mad, but why should I make other happy when all most put me down about it

[Stevie]

People confuse me for being a smart-alec, but what is so wrong about stating an opinion?

Also- I'm an actress. But that means nothing. But when you meet me in person- I'm rather shy, but once I get to know you and visa-versa, I am VERY talkative.

[mangakaluna]

-3-' Most people I meet, I am usually scared of them...I have the WORST stage fright, it takes nearly all my courage to go talk to someone I don't know... and I'm always scared I'll come off as a jerk or an idiot.

It's kinda funny, my best friends are usually the people that, when I first met them, I was scared that they would be mean/rude/ect (then they weren't!)

Most of the time, I don't let my first impressions get to me.

[Stevie]

I'm looking forward to meeting you people at Kcon. XD I have a 'Graphic Novels' Section in my library- so once I get a fine paid I'm gonna get the VERY FIRST volume of Death Note.

[RandomCosplay]

the thing is frist impressions should not matter people usely in difrent moods from a day to day basis what more people need to do is try being around the person more then once to make a a full decision

some people get Nervis and start talking alot or the other way around not every one in the world and be comfy from the start

when I 1st came to a meet -up I was like there not going to like me at 1st every got along fine untill I asked for some cash yes I know stuped... the thing that made it more wrong was when every one got upset with me about it then my Xgf, gf at the time got all back in your guys Faces and made it more wrong but im not with her any more, im on here day to day, 1 more chance is all I ask

Edit> I put comas to fix what I see as people telling me to breath lol

[jaybug]

Wow, breath control while in a coma! Amazing!

Commas are used to separate incomplete thoughts, but are related, in a sentence. Commas separate clauses.

As soon as I hit the button I thought it needed modifying.

This is not to bust your chops about commas. But what you said reminded me of my own faults of comma use. I would do as you did, and had run-on sentences all the time. Made it look as bad. I got better, but not necessarily faster, not until I started writing a lot everyday.

Speaking of writing everyday. I think that might help you in your troubles right now. Helps to keep your side of the street clean. That way you can be sure to catch more flies with honey, and not to use vinegar thinking it honey.

[RandomCosplay]

Wow, breath control while in a coma! Amazing!

Commas are used to separate incomplete thoughts, but are related, in a sentence. Commas separate clauses.

As soon as I hit the button I thought it needed modifying.

This is not to bust your chops about commas. But what you said reminded me of my own faults of comma use. I would do as you did, and had run-on sentences all the time. Made it look as bad. I got better, but not necessarily faster, not until I started writing a lot everyday.

Speaking of writing everyday. I think that might help you in your troubles right now. Helps to keep your side of the street clean. That way you can be sure to catch more flies with honey, and not to use vinegar thinking it honey.

lol I know I am trying

[nikkiolie]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

From what you are saying people shouldn't act differently at all. So I meet someone and think they are rude, if they don't change their personality I am always going to think they are rude.....you are really only hurting yourself with that statement.

And by all means, if people do not like you, you have to change. It's simple as that. Humans are social creatures and the thought of being shunned hurts us. So sometimes it is a good idea to change your personality to please others. You want friends right?

when I 1st came to a meet -up I was like there not going to like me at 1st every got along fine untill I asked for some cash yes I know stuped... the thing that made it more wrong was when every one got upset with me about it then my Xgf, gf at the time got all back in your guys Faces and made it more wrong but im not with her any more, im on here day to day, 1 more chance is all I ask

Edit> I put comas to fix what I see as people telling me to breath lol

Alright to address the issue on money. What makes you think any of us have money to even lend to you? If you saw some people flashing money around it you still don't ask. It is very rude. I'm not sure what you needed the money for but you should never ask a stranger or someone you just met for money. That is a way to start off a bad impression. That is something that people will always remember you by.

"Hey, do you remember randomcosplay? No, who is that? He is the guy that was asking for money so he and his girlfriend can cosplay. OH HIM!"

Do you really want to be remembered in that way?

[RandomCosplay]

I don't believe in first impressions- I don't think somebody should act a different way than the already do.

So- lets say one day You're Naruto, and one day your Sasuke.

Seriously- why make a big personality change?

I'm also way nicer in person. I don't usually rant about stuff. :/

From what you are saying people shouldn't act differently at all. So I meet someone and think they are rude, if they don't change their personality I am always going to think they are rude.....you are really only hurting yourself with that statement.

And by all means, if people do not like you, you have to change. It's simple as that. Humans are social creatures and the thought of being shunned hurts us. So sometimes it is a good idea to change your personality to please others. You want friends right?

when I 1st came to a meet -up I was like there not going to like me at 1st every got along fine untill I asked for some cash yes I know stuped... the thing that made it more wrong was when every one got upset with me about it then my Xgf, gf at the time got all back in your guys Faces and made it more wrong but im not with her any more, im on here day to day, 1 more chance is all I ask

Edit> I put comas to fix what I see as people telling me to breath lol

Alright to address the issue on money. What makes you think any of us have money to even lend to you? If you saw some people flashing money around it you still don't ask. It is very rude. I'm not sure what you needed the money for but you should never ask a stranger or someone you just met for money. That is a way to start off a bad impression. That is something that people will always remember you by.

"Hey, do you remember randomcosplay? No, who is that? He is the guy that was asking for money so he and his girlfriend can cosplay. OH HIM!"

Do you really want to be remembered in that way?

that is why right now I want it to all stat over with every one
no more asking for stuff no more down topics (unliss I message some one for advise and keep it off the Forums area)

is ok with every one no hard feeling no more thinking difrent I what to start this all over for the fact of maken friends with all of you is that ok?

[TanisNikana]

This topic and all others approaching an inflammatory nature will now be locked. Please raise personal concerns in PMs.