Author Topic: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!  (Read 4741 times)

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Offline RandomCosplay

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I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« on: February 16, 2009, 10:08:59 pm »
she cheated on me with her X and broke it off completely

I have never been more hurt

Offline jaybug

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #1 on: February 16, 2009, 10:39:45 pm »
Sorry to hear that.

Take time to feel bad/sad etc. But NEVER NEVER EVER GO BACK TO HER!

Go ahead eat lots of ice cream. Or if old enough drink until you puke.

And tomorrow start getting busy with your own stuff. I mean as if your life depended upon it.

Or not. Wallow in the self-pity and self-loathing.

Sorry to be so tough love, but there are too many people out there who will tell you what you want to hear, and let you damage yourself further because it is the kinder gentler way. I'm just hooping you step off the emotional roller coaster. Grief takes the time it takes, but you don't need to perpetuate it longer than is good for your soul. I didn't and I have a great wife now. It wasn't overnight. Life never is.
Have Fun

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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #2 on: February 16, 2009, 10:58:17 pm »
Sorry to hear that.

Take time to feel bad/sad etc. But NEVER NEVER EVER GO BACK TO HER!

Go ahead eat lots of ice cream. Or if old enough drink until you puke.

And tomorrow start getting busy with your own stuff. I mean as if your life depended upon it.

Or not. Wallow in the self-pity and self-loathing.

Sorry to be so tough love, but there are too many people out there who will tell you what you want to hear, and let you damage yourself further because it is the kinder gentler way. I'm just hooping you step off the emotional roller coaster. Grief takes the time it takes, but you don't need to perpetuate it longer than is good for your soul. I didn't and I have a great wife now. It wasn't overnight. Life never is.

true true I'm trying to just wish I had people to go and hang out with to get over all this

Offline melchizedek

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #3 on: February 16, 2009, 10:59:39 pm »
well time to move on...
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Offline makichan

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #4 on: February 16, 2009, 11:06:02 pm »
It's human to have some recovery time though.
I don't think it's very healthy to suppress it.
Just don't let this experience be the bane of your existence.
It hurts now, but with pain comes wisdom.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it's okay to have recovery time, but don't let it hold you back forever.
You can't move forward if you're stuck in the past.
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Offline Teasel

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #5 on: February 17, 2009, 12:40:59 am »
Hey, at least your girl friend didn't leave you for a long distance relationship with another girl.
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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #6 on: February 17, 2009, 01:59:56 am »
Hey, at least your girl friend didn't leave you for a long distance relationship with another girl.


to all you are so true and to the girl leaving you for one..... Ive been there

Offline jaybug

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #7 on: February 17, 2009, 06:21:32 pm »
Are you back from the abyss yet?
Have Fun

Jay

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #8 on: February 17, 2009, 06:22:18 pm »
I went out today and I never knew how much I loved her untill shes is gone even tho she did all this to me

my pain is so strong it stops my  breathing I need her so bad

Offline pepito

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #9 on: February 17, 2009, 08:36:47 pm »
You realize you sound a a codependent right?

You don't need her, or anyone for that matter.

You NEED to stop letting her control your life, look around your room/house whatever, and get rid of all the stuff that reminds you of her (and don't give me that everything reminds me of her crap), photos, gifts, her toothbrush, that type of stuff, get it out of your sight. Delete her number from your cell, get rid of her email, then spend some good quality time with your friends. That's what guy friends are for, helping you get over the X. Go to a club (We have some great ones in Portland), let loose, get drunk, have some fun.. you'll be over her in time for The Watchmen premier.

But quit posting about your pain and crap like that because it's just going to make you dwell on your situation even more.

Offline jaybug

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2009, 08:39:43 pm »
I agree with Pepito. It also makes you look pathetic. Maybe you'll get some mercy nookie, but...it won't get you a girlfriend that thinks the world of you. You'll get a drug-addict/alcoholic instead.
Have Fun

Jay

Offline TanisNikana

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2009, 08:47:06 pm »
Yep, so get over it!

Offline nikkiolie

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #12 on: February 17, 2009, 08:51:30 pm »
very well said guys ;D

Hell at this point I don't thinking bringing it up over and over will even get him pity nookie >_>

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #13 on: February 17, 2009, 08:56:54 pm »
its just i I talk about not for pitty I honistly feel stronger the more I let it out then hold it in

I was at the mall today every place I have been to in oregon she was allways with me
so it makes it hard I was hanging out and all I could think of I remember her smileing here when we was together

after my mom pasted away I've been alone I found her and it felt right now with out her im back with that feeling of lose

my mom never wanted to raise me the way most familys do she hid me away from the world then after she died its all new to me
so I hope you all understand why I take things more to heart

Ive lost everything even became homless at one point

my Family wanted nothing to do with me
after my mom pasted

I was lucky to find her when I did she took me out of wanting to end it all

no one has ever been there like that for me

I am new to everything talking, thinking all I want is people to call family but every time I feel like opening up some one is there to put me back down

Offline mangakaluna

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #14 on: February 17, 2009, 09:00:20 pm »
Ok...Was she your first girlfriend?

And are you foreign?

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #15 on: February 17, 2009, 09:04:34 pm »
Ok...Was she your first girlfriend?

And are you foreign?

no she was not my 1st, but the thing is I never found some one like that, I never feel this hard to the point I cant breath when she hits my mind

and no im not foreign

Offline mangakaluna

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #16 on: February 17, 2009, 09:05:58 pm »
Ok-

Well, if she cheated on you, she wasn't happy in the relationship with you. If you loved her that much, then let her go.

Offline MiriaRose

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #17 on: February 17, 2009, 09:06:13 pm »
I don't suppose you realize that with every post you make like that one, you're just making us more annoyed?

You're telling all of this to the wrong people.
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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #18 on: February 17, 2009, 09:08:14 pm »
I don't suppose you realize that with every post you make like that one, you're just making us more annoyed?

You're telling all of this to the wrong people.

sorry I'll hold it in

Offline MiriaRose

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #19 on: February 17, 2009, 09:10:25 pm »
I never said that. Take the advice of the people in this thread, or stop complaining about it.

It seems to me that you just don't want to get over her. If you did, you'd be off at a club or something meeting new people instead of whining about it on the internet. Follow Pepito's advice. Seriously.
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Offline makichan

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #20 on: February 17, 2009, 09:11:08 pm »
She didn't save you though.
She just added to the negativity. Stop giving her so much credit  ::)
It's only going to keep you down.
Face it.
In the end, she only betrayed you. She seems selfish, really. :/
You need to be able to stand on your two feet and gain some independence.
You should try to have more confidence in yourself, you know?
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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #21 on: February 17, 2009, 09:13:07 pm »
I never said that. Take the advice of the people in this thread, or stop complaining about it.

It seems to me that you just don't want to get over her. If you did, you'd be off at a club or something meeting new people instead of whining about it on the internet. Follow Pepito's advice. Seriously.

the thing is
I dont get over people easyly and if your up for taken me out for a drink then fine but I have no cash I found out just now as I opend my mail she has be 1357 in dept for 2 bills she said she paid but lied and never did

Offline mangakaluna

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #22 on: February 17, 2009, 09:14:37 pm »
From: http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-a-Relationship-in-Less-Than-a-Week

If you want to know how to get over a relationship in less than a week, you have to be willing to let this relationship go. Once you're ready, it's not so hard.


 Steps
Monday: Cry it out, release your feelings!! This is the best thing to do to vent out whatever you feel and just have some alone time.

Tuesday: Talk to a friend or someone trusted about what you thought about your ex, but think more about why you broke up.

Wednesday: Go out with your friend for just a day out of relaxing and enjoyment. Make sure you don't go somewhere that will bring memories of your ex. Wednesday (just a representation of what would be the 3rd day after your relationship, it could be Sunday, or Thursday, or whatever.) is the day to forget.

Thursday: Get rid of any possessions your ex gave you. You can keep them if you think they are beneficiary or they bring good memories, but only look at it as a token of friendship, not of your relationship. If they bring bad memories, then throw it out or dispose of it in any way you desire. Don't hang things from your ex all over your room. It shows that you are still obssessed and really into your ex.

Friday: Think about the past week and how you have done without your ex. If it was fun, and you weren't thinking about your ex 24/7, this is a good sign that you are ready to move on and release those feelings for your ex. If you have been sad, or constantly think about your ex, you are not ready, and maybe you are still in love with him/her. Make sure you know the difference between love and missing your ex's presence. Never rush yourself, the healing process takes a long time, and it may take several weeks, and if so, just stretch out this process, and spend a few more days venting out feelings, and then go onto the "tuesday" process, etc.


 Tips
Act in a respectable manner.

Never talk about your ex boy/girlfriend because that can cause some problems between you and your date.

No matter how badly you want to keep all your facebook/myspace etc. messages, DELETE DELETE DELETE!!! Hand written letters and emails can be printed and stowed awayed to be looked at later but until you can handle it, pretend she doesnt exist.
Keep a girlfriend box, later, when you are over her you will appreciate having those memories.
delete her phone number. i know its hard but you dont want the drunken phone calls and texting to start. when you are over her you may see her on a night out to a club and then u can either ask for it again as friends or you realise you dont need it.

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #23 on: February 17, 2009, 09:14:55 pm »
She didn't save you though.
She just added to the negativity. Stop giving her so much credit  ::)
It's only going to keep you down.
Face it.
In the end, she only betrayed you. She seems selfish, really. :/
You need to be able to stand on your two feet and gain some independence.
You should try to have more confidence in yourself, you know?


I'm trying like I said befor talking on here lets me vent and usely when I'm done I feel so so so so much better untill the next day when I find out more **** about what she did to me to make it worse
« Last Edit: February 17, 2009, 09:17:35 pm by RandomCosplay »

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #24 on: February 17, 2009, 09:16:51 pm »
From: http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Over-a-Relationship-in-Less-Than-a-Week

If you want to know how to get over a relationship in less than a week, you have to be willing to let this relationship go. Once you're ready, it's not so hard.


 Steps
Monday: Cry it out, release your feelings!! This is the best thing to do to vent out whatever you feel and just have some alone time.

Tuesday: Talk to a friend or someone trusted about what you thought about your ex, but think more about why you broke up.

Wednesday: Go out with your friend for just a day out of relaxing and enjoyment. Make sure you don't go somewhere that will bring memories of your ex. Wednesday (just a representation of what would be the 3rd day after your relationship, it could be Sunday, or Thursday, or whatever.) is the day to forget.

Thursday: Get rid of any possessions your ex gave you. You can keep them if you think they are beneficiary or they bring good memories, but only look at it as a token of friendship, not of your relationship. If they bring bad memories, then throw it out or dispose of it in any way you desire. Don't hang things from your ex all over your room. It shows that you are still obssessed and really into your ex.

Friday: Think about the past week and how you have done without your ex. If it was fun, and you weren't thinking about your ex 24/7, this is a good sign that you are ready to move on and release those feelings for your ex. If you have been sad, or constantly think about your ex, you are not ready, and maybe you are still in love with him/her. Make sure you know the difference between love and missing your ex's presence. Never rush yourself, the healing process takes a long time, and it may take several weeks, and if so, just stretch out this process, and spend a few more days venting out feelings, and then go onto the "tuesday" process, etc.


 Tips
Act in a respectable manner.

Never talk about your ex boy/girlfriend because that can cause some problems between you and your date.

No matter how badly you want to keep all your facebook/myspace etc. messages, DELETE DELETE DELETE!!! Hand written letters and emails can be printed and stowed awayed to be looked at later but until you can handle it, pretend she doesnt exist.
Keep a girlfriend box, later, when you are over her you will appreciate having those memories.
delete her phone number. i know its hard but you dont want the drunken phone calls and texting to start. when you are over her you may see her on a night out to a club and then u can either ask for it again as friends or you realise you dont need it.

I can only get as far as step3 no one to really hang out with

thats why I am trying on here with some people with the same likes anime, cosplay and ect. to make some friends to go out with

Offline MiriaRose

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #25 on: February 17, 2009, 09:18:53 pm »
You're not actually trying. You're using the excuse that you don't get over people easily so that you won't have to face the reality.

Grow up. You might be "new to the world," but that's not anyone's problem but your own.

Everyone is in debt. Yours is only $1,357? Hah. You're lucky.
"Would you kindly. ."

Offline nikkiolie

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #26 on: February 17, 2009, 09:19:55 pm »
Ok look, we gave you advice. If you want to take it or not that is your problem. No one really wants you bringing this place down with this crap. So if talking helps you vent write journals in myspace or something, but clearly no one here wants to listen so take our advice or shut up.

and I am over $2000 in dept and growing. I wont be able to start paying if off till I get out of school. I am a very lucky person. A lot of people can be close to $60,000 in dept after four years of college. So if your debt is lower then mine you should be fine.

Get off your ass, get a job. Make friends at that job and move on.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2009, 09:21:28 pm by nikkiolie »

Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #27 on: February 17, 2009, 09:22:20 pm »
You're not actually trying. You're using the excuse that you don't get over people easily so that you won't have to face the reality.

Grow up. You might be "new to the world," but that's not anyone's problem but your own.

Everyone is in debt. Yours is only $1,357? Hah. You're lucky.

ok how about this what is most of you all doing tomorrow?

lets hang out so I can get to do the 3step if you all really want to help as much as it seems coz honistly you all would of not hit this as much as you all ready had so here I'll even meet you at whatever place

1 I have no cash
2 no car
3 but I do have bus tickets

Offline EveofAbyss

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #28 on: February 17, 2009, 09:24:15 pm »
This is last year all over again. Don't make the same mistake, RandomCosplay. Remember when you had the whole forums on you because you needed money and couldn't just let it go or couldn't get over people's responses, but kept finding reasons to not just accept what people were saying to you? You're doing the exact same thing. Please, for your sake and the sake of everyone here on the forums. Take advice and move on. Nothing is nearly as monumental and worth your exasperation as you may think it is.

Just move on, drop the subject, don't give more reasons why people's suggestions won't work for you, just move on.

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Offline RandomCosplay

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #29 on: February 17, 2009, 09:30:04 pm »
This is last year all over again. Don't make the same mistake, RandomCosplay. Remember when you had the whole forums on you because you needed money and couldn't just let it go or couldn't get over people's responses, but kept finding reasons to not just accept what people were saying to you? You're doing the exact same thing. Please, for your sake and the sake of everyone here on the forums. Take advice and move on. Nothing is nearly as monumental and worth your exasperation as you may think it is.

Just move on, drop the subject, don't give more reasons why people's suggestions won't work for you, just move on.

End.

END

lets for get this topic ok all of us and start over I understand all and I do take it and ran with it
I have I honistly sleep much better with know you all do care even at some times I think I only get the advise for some on shut me up

heres my new start right here and now

who is all going to the feb meeting ?

I will be there and I look forward for us all to start over is that fine with all of you?

Offline TanisNikana

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Re: I really need some one to talk to even more now... she cheated!
« Reply #30 on: February 17, 2009, 09:36:38 pm »
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