What makes a person attractive to you?

[nikkiolie]

I was going to do this as a poll but that wont work out as well. For the longest time I didn't want a relationship but now I think I am ready. I am feel unsatisfied and I need someone that I can talk to. I am just wondering what makes a person attractive to others.

For me I like someone who makes me laugh. Someone who accepts me the way I am, flaws and all and wont try to change me. Being attractive would help too but isn't a must. This is just a personal thing of mine, but I have always been the outcast and have never gotten the guy I want so going out with a really hot guy would be nice at least once for me. That happened once but like I said I wasn't really looking for a relationship so it didn't work out and now he lives in Vegas x.x I miss him ;_;

So yeah. I want to know what other people think is attractive.

[cloud-9]

an understanding kind hearted human being, whom you can relate to and share your deepest secrets and feel safe.

[jaybug]

I'm trying to figure out if you want to get a guy who is hot for bragging rights, or ...dunno.

Anyway. Can girls ask guys to buy her a cup of coffee today? Then make it like an interview. If all he can talk about is himself, reject. It he is a complete jerk, reject. If he is socially clumsy, toss-up. If he talks about what he is doing, non-stop, could be the next Bill Gates, or just obsessive compulsive, lol.

Try not to be so tsudere. Because most guys don't get to see the softer side, only the I wanna kick your @ss side. I say this, as most of your photos have you looking in this manner.

I have a personal theory. That if you go to a mirror, and make a big smile, if you start cracking yourself up, you don't take yourself too seriously. Lordy, how I need those sometimes. lol

If opposites attract, go find a flake.

[oslapedo]

I think that the most attractive thing of all is good conversation ~

nikki, Maybe you could try blind dates or something more casual to meet new people and see what you're into?

[superjaz]

The first thing I Noticed about my husband at a group mall meet up was that he was nice to people around him, and that is something caught my eye, little things like holding doors or making sure people had a ride home.  I had mentioned wanting to see azumanga daioh and when we met up again we talked and So many little things from child hood that we both remember and the fact I Didn't think anime was dirty word, we have a lot of same likes but a lot of things we like different.   For advice  I would suggest 2 things 1 some one you can eat with because if you love a big steak and they are vegan it will be difficult.  2 some one you can read play games veg out with, like its a half hour before bed you want to what? read play rock band? watch anime, if they play video games for hours on end is that okay? or is it you playing on end what are they doing?                             on physical attributes I longer hair but not longer then mine, and this is one that that i realised after meeting my husband, I loves me a tall skinny nerd with glasses, emphasis on the tall, I think because I am short ish and that high shelf is so high , my tiny grandma liked my husband right off the back because he was tall.   

[reppy]

Someone that's a little unusual, like me.  Has an open heart and mind.  Can be silly, but is just barely mature enough.  I should be able to talk to her about anything without fear of being judged and viceversa.  Values are very important, too.  I can't date someone that does drugs or treats people poorly.  Should have a good sense of humor (see also: laugh at my jokes).  A love of puns is a plus.

But when it really comes down to it, I think it's really attractive when I can have amazing conversations with someone. That sounds like a lot of pressure, but it's not.  My mind is constantly racing and I'm always thinking of things and it's nice to have someone to share it with it, discuss, expound upon, etc.  As a guy, I'm very reserved with my male friends.  But if I feel I can trust a girl with my thoughts and feelings, I'll openly share.  And to me, if a girl wants to listen and understand to what I say, that's very sexy.  I also have a tendency to get randomly really excited about certain topics, read a whole ton about them, and then want to nerd out and discuss them with someone.  So, she'll have to be able to tolerate topics ranging from mechanical pencils, bodybuilding, and Middle Eastern politics.  

Originality is a plus.  If someone can surprise me somehow, tell me how they came to a conclusion that I find interesting, that's awesome.

[cloud-9]

Someone that's a little unusual, like me.  Has an open heart and mind.  Can be silly, but is just barely mature enough.  I should be able to talk to her about anything without fear of being judged and viceversa.  Values are very important, too.  I can't date someone that does drugs or treats people poorly.  Should have a good sense of humor (see also: laugh at my jokes).  A love of puns is a plus.

But when it really comes down to it, I think it's really attractive when I can have amazing conversations with someone. That sounds like a lot of pressure, but it's not.  My mind is constantly racing and I'm always thinking of things and it's nice to have someone to share it with it, discuss, expound upon, etc.  As a guy, I'm very reserved with my male friends.  But if I feel I can trust a girl with my thoughts and feelings, I'll openly share.  And to me, if a girl wants to listen and understand to what I say, that's very sexy.  I also have a tendency to get randomly really excited about certain topics, read a whole ton about them, and then want to nerd out and discuss them with someone.  So, she'll have to be able to tolerate topics ranging from mechanical pencils, bodybuilding, and Middle Eastern politics. 

Originality is a plus.  If someone can surprise me somehow, tell me how they came to a conclusion that I find interesting, that's awesome.

tell it like it is! i totally agree with you. and nice crossplay profile photo? lolz

[Princette]

Most of all, they have to be very fun. People that are constantly negative are very annoying to be around and I dislike when they don't ever want to try different things. Otherwise, I'm attracted to lots of different types. It's just the way they carry themselves that attracts me, I suppose.

[Cyprus]

  I love that I can come home after work, turn on a video game & my G/F & I play through it together even if it's only one player. One of us controls it while the other helps navigate as well as enjoying the story.

  Although that is just one example, that applies to just about our entire life together. We do just about everything as a couple & enjoy every bit of it equally. We share the same interests in just about everything & we accept the ones that we don't share. We have been together around 6 years now & still enjoy each others company just as much as when we met. We finish each others sentences all the time & even read each others thoughts.

So I guess for me...someone who is physically appealing is nice & all, but if I don't have anything in common with them or they have a terrible personality, it's very un-attractive. I have been through the dating different people routine & experimenting to see what types of girls interest me...& to be honest, you will never know until you get to know them. Some may be super "hot" but be complete jerks, others may be kinda plain but have the most amazing personalities...I will take the latter.

I'm not gonna say much more than that really...I love my G/F & don't ever plan to be on the search for another partner in this lifetime. So on that note, good luck Nikkiolie on your search for a mate...be open-minded & no matter what, be yourself! Nothing worse than finding out someone isn't who you thought them to be. Best of luck!

  

[soundninja12]

^ What I love about you guys is that you guys are so together, and yet so individual ^^
Makes me very happy when I see couples like that.

I like people that can accept me for who I am, no matter what. And they don't mind it when I go in to my super emo mood and start crying for almost no reason at all, I especially like when people talk me down out of it. I like people that laugh at my puns and horribly perverted jokes, because if they can't get those, then most of the time, they don't get me.
Being a cosplayer, of course, is one MAJOR plus~

What I like in couples (as Chris was sort of saying) is when people like each other, you can see it in the way they look at each other, but they don't hang on each other all the time. I like when they are different people, and when they are together they are still different people, just, well, together xD

GOOD LUCK TO YOU NIKKI~
I promise, you are an awesome person, a beautiful girl, and very very lovable.
^^
<3's
~Katie

[nikkiolie]

I'm trying to figure out if you want to get a guy who is hot for bragging rights, or ...dunno.

Not really for bragging rights. I just want to be with a good looking guy. The real reason....well isn't very appropriate for this forum XD

Thanks to everyone. I am still interested in hearing what others have to say. Not sure if I would be willing to do the whole blind date thing. =/

[Teasel]

I find nerdy or geeky women to be very attractive. Physical appearences isn't a must for me, as I have had to basically lower my standards because I've learned that beautiful women tend to want someone more attractive than me.
And like just about everyone else here, I'm looking for someone who will accept me and all my flaws. But more importantly, I'm looking for someone that I can make happy. I want them to be happy with me, I want them to enjoy being with me. I enjoy making other people happy and laugh, which is why I want to be a comedian.

But to be honest, I'm lonely; I've been lonely for a while now. I don't really want to get into it, but if someone can fill that hole in my life, then appearances don't really matter that much to me.

[dshwshr55]

Well ..... I like girls with long hair .. >.>
I guess that's simple.

[Wuntvor]

Well ..... I like girls with long hair .. >.>
I guess that's simple.

You know, I thought about it and I agree, long hair.   

I sat here for awhile just contemplating this.  What is it that I find makes me attracted to a person.  For women it has always been long hair.  I guess it is the whole femininity thing.  It easier for me to say what I don't find attractive  I am turned off by piercings and tattoos.  I don't mind earrings (small ones) but eyebrows and nose and tongue piercings turn me off fast.  I also don't like cornrows or dreadlocks.  I don't know why exactly I just don't.  Smoking is also a turn-off for me.

I am attracted by a persons attitude as well.  How do they act in public?  I tend to migrate towards the quiet wallflowers.  I myself am a bit of an extrovert, but tend to be shy in social settings.  If someone is having a good time with their friends I usually don't want to butt into their time and so I look for the person who isn't really doing anything and go and try to start a conversation.  I think I just like to make people happy, so when I see someone who doesn't look like they are actually having a good time, I am drawn to them.

I don't  really care a lot about appearance other than what I already stated are turn-offs.  I suppose everyone is slightly effected by the socially accepted standards of beauty.  We all want our love interest to fit to this standard.  Such a standard does effect my choices in who I will approach first in a given situation, but it doesn't effect my affections when I find someone I like.  My wife doesn't really fit the standard of beauty that most Americans follow, but I love her dearly for other reasons.

What attracted me to her in the first place?  I suppose it was her artistic talent and my interest in cartoons and animation.  She is a very good artist and I was drawn to her because of it.  She also is a very shy individual around people she doesn't know.  And she has long hair.   

I think if you really want to understand the opposite sex you should watch Mark Gungor and his Laugh Your Way to a Better Marriage videos.  I have a YouTube clip here that will give you an example of one of them.

[reppy]

I am turned off by piercings and tattoos.  I don't mind earrings (small ones) but eyebrows and nose and tongue piercings turn me off fast.

I agree.. tattoos really gross me out.  Piercings, it depends where they are.  The tiny little stud in the nose?  It can be cute.  But big gauge earrings and stuff like that?  Not for me. ^_^;

[oslapedo]

I find tattoos and piercings attractive on guys and chicks P:

[reppy]

I'm a fan of skin, I guess. xD

[kylite]

What do I find attractive...

Looks count for 30%
Attitude/Smarts/Loyalty counts for 30%
Being Self Sufficient counts for 30%
Love of video games/anime/fun is the final 10%

[soundninja12]

PLUGS ARE BEAUTIFUL THINGS!
I'm just putting it out there~
And I think that above all else is the way someone treats you. I have only had a few friends that have never used me, and those are the ones I love most, and would be most willing to date.
I think piercings are fine, anywhere. I don't give a rat's ass about tatoos either. People are people no matter how small, tatooed, or pierced~
Every person has a chance to be awesome, you just have to get to know them. Do not ever give an automatic "NO" because of a lip ring.

[chelseahavoc]

the eyes and personality is what gets me. as they say, the eyes are the window to the soul. and having thing in common (like anime/videogames/cosplay/pool/otherstuff) is a big helper xD

[jaybug]

Gee, forgot to mention being needed/wanted. duh.

[Sayda]

If I can fart in front of them, then I know what I have is good.

[Kimiski]

Honestly, personality is way bigger for me than looks are, though looks are important
I'm not gonna find someone who looks greasy and like they don't care about themselves a bit attractive.

Someone with a very outgoing and adventurous personality. Recently, this one guy really caught my attention because he just seemed to be enjoying life. He didn't know me but we were sitting with the same group of friends and he just started talking to me like we were friends, and it was really natural conversation. As we got to know each other, we had amazing conversations on music, writing and art.

 So I guess good conversation it a big plus for me too. Also the small things like being polite to other people and all that too. Physically, eyes really get my attention.

[Cyprus]

I am turned off by piercings and tattoos.  I don't mind earrings (small ones) but eyebrows and nose and tongue piercings turn me off fast.

I can say the complete opposite here...having spend most of my growing up hanging with punkers & the like. I love tattoos & piercings (except septums & disc guages) on people...it's another form of art & I think that when done right, it only adds to a person's beauty. My G/F has multiple ear piercings as well as a beautiful rose tattoo on her lower back...LOVE IT! I myself happen to have 5 piercings as well as a few tattoos. They are a way for people to express themselves as well as a form of "fashion." Those are my feelings on that matter anyway 

[reppy]

I am turned off by piercings and tattoos.  I don't mind earrings (small ones) but eyebrows and nose and tongue piercings turn me off fast.

I can say the complete opposite here...having spend most of my growing up hanging with punkers & the like. I love tattoos & piercings (except septums & disc guages) on people...it's another form of art & I think that when done right, it only adds to a person's beauty. My G/F has multiple ear piercings as well as a beautiful rose tattoo on her lower back...LOVE IT! I myself happen to have 5 piercings as well as a few tattoos. They are a way for people to express themselves as well as a form of "fashion." Those are my feelings on that matter anyway 

Hm, not sure how that quote got attributed to me.  But I basically said the same thing, so...  To each his own.  Some women would not be attracted to a guy that shaves his head or has a gigantic beard.  Or doesn't shower.  All of those are "statements", haha.  Just so happens I'm not attracted to tattoos.  I guess I'm more attracted to someone that makes a statement by not getting a tattoo.   

I've yet to see a piece of art that was so awesome that I simply could not live without having it on my body at all times. ^_^ If I ever did, I'd just remember what it looked like. XD

[shadoworganoid]

Hmmmm.....

Well, as much as I hate to think this way, I would have to say I notice Asian Girls before anything else. lol

2 years ago when we did had Japanese exchange students visit ths school for a week, I could not stop staring at them.... lol

But yes, the first and most important thing to look for is someone with good values and a good personality.
The inside is what matters really, not the outside.

[~boogiepop~]

Humor and having fun is the biggest thing for me. And that they accept me for me.

I hate people who take things too seriously. Around me they get easily offended because usually I'm just being silly.

I guess that's one of the reasons my boyfriend and I get along so well. He's pretty much my dream guy though, and I've never thought about anyone that way before. He's hilarious and fun, outgoing, nice and thinks about me and my feelings constantly, accepts every hobby or weird oddity I like even if he isn't fond of them himself, I can have a range of conversations with him from stupid crap to intelligent discussions, and he's taller then me, attractive and has curly hair.

PERFECT I SAY. For me at least. He's also started to make me find random things attractive that I didn't think of before. Like now that I've dated him I find guys with broad shoulders attractive, and stupid little mannerisms he has.

[DemonSpawn]

I think people who can reach the top shelf for me () are attractive. Lol, j/k, but that is a plus...

Hrmm, I must say I'm a sucker for eyes, I love eyes, they can say so much about a person.

I am really big on a great sense of humor and open-mindedness as well.

Someone smart is big too, someone I can have a great conversation with, someone who challenges me.


Looks are a plus, but unnecessary if everything else feels right.

[Tanuki19]

he has to be a TOTAL nerd like me and when i make a nerd reference, he has to understand it. XD
he has to be super duper sweet!
he has to be super duper funny!
and cute is always a plus~

[TurboSaiyanJason]

he has to be a TOTAL nerd like me and when i make a nerd reference, he has to understand it. XD
he has to be super duper sweet!
he has to be super duper funny!
and cute is always a plus~

Sounds like me, except I'm a young old fart, and I barely have enough money to call myself a half-breed nerd. Though what I can afford I make sure it's something useful and worthwhile. Even the plushies and figures I buy.

[jaybug]

I had a female friend a few years back. For a while she was my best friend. She was beautiful to look at, and terribly sweet too. But there was no way I was ever going to let myself become her boyfriend. It goes back to the needed/wanted. I knew I was never going to be more than a niche toy, or something that you pull off the shelf and use, and then forget about afterward. And most of the uses would be for things like getting stuff off the top shelf.

But I don't regret being her friend. I learned more about women from that, and it has made me a better husband.

Go for handsome, rather than beautiful, the chances they may not be as great a pain are better. lol

[TurboSaiyanJason]

I didn't get to finish earlier because of some unfriendly noise in a nearby room and we'll leave it at that.
But now that I'm back...

What attracts me to a girl most often is when she's in a Cinderella situation. Either pretty, clever, or both, and perfectly willing to accept someone but has no one to notice her. it's when I see this situation, that I swoop in and do everything I can to help her.

Other turn ons are being both a halfway nerd/otaku and outgoing partygirl, optimistic is the word.

Funny how we're openly posting our opinions on here, yet we're wise enough to not post in the singles +18 or -17 topics.

[makichan]

I have a thing for silly guys who know how to have fun and when to just take it easy. I really like piercings and tattoos but I don't really like plugs, long hair, or buzz cuts. I don't mind shaggy hair at all though. In fact, I think it's cute  :>

And I don't care what anyone says, I find that looks are important to some degree (since we all have different tastes anyway). It's certainly not the most important thing to me but it's nice to be physically attracted to one another, amirite? Also, they have to be an animal lover and put up with my love for cats. I collect a lot of cat stuff ^^;

I love a guy that likes to dress up and is willing to have fun on the dance floor, even if he's not the best dancer. It's also a plus if he appreciates art to some degree and will allow me drag him to plays, musicals, and concert events from time to time. Lastly, while similar interests are a definite plus, I recognize that, for me, shared values and beliefs are more important to have in common.

[Wuntvor]

..... Lastly, while similar interests are a definite plus, I recognize that, for me, shared values and beliefs are more important to have in common.

This is the topic that people tend to avoid talking about, but ends up being a major deciding point about a lasting relationship.  Religious, or even life values and beliefs.  That certain someone could have every other thing you look for in a soul-mate, but if they constantly try "converting" you to their way of viewing the world (both physical and spiritual), give them up now and save yourself a lot of grief.

I pride myself on not caring about what others believe or practice, as long as it doesn't harm anyone or become a nuisance to me.  When you get close to someone though, you can't ignore this anymore.  Visiting a shrine, going to church, Christmas, Hanukkah, Easter, burning incense, karma, going door-to-door with them to "spread the word".  These things will become obstacles that most will not be able to overcome, and frankly shouldn't try to.  I am sure many of you have already stumbled onto an uncomfortable situation involving this.

[reppy]

Values are most important to me. But, I will admit despite the fact that I am non-religious I don't think I could see myself marrying and raising a family with an atheist. Anyone else I could. It's not that I think atheists are bad people, since plenty of my friends are. I guess for me, I think of raising a family a chance to instill my values into someone and hopefully do my part to make the world a better place. And while my views on "God" are hard to make tangible, it is a part of who I am and I want to share that with someone that doesn't think that is silly, foolish, whatever.

May the god (or non-god) of your choosing grant you peace. ^_^

[Teasel]

..... Lastly, while similar interests are a definite plus, I recognize that, for me, shared values and beliefs are more important to have in common.

This is the topic that people tend to avoid talking about, but ends up being a major deciding point about a lasting relationship.  Religious, or even life values and beliefs.  That certain someone could have every other thing you look for in a soul-mate, but if they constantly try "converting" you to their way of viewing the world (both physical and spiritual), give them up now and save yourself a lot of grief.

Yeah, I've encountered this a couple times now. Luckily, I could see this coming with most of them and pulled the rip chord and dismissed any notions of a relationship with them. However, this last girl (luckily we were just friends) was a born again christian and practically fanatical in her beliefs. Not only that, she confused auditory hallucinations of psychosis brought on by PTSD, with the voice of God. Now even a friendship with her is becoming difficult as she tries to convert me.

Like reppy, it's hard for me to define my beliefs in a clear and concise manner. But I can be with someone, even an atheist, so long as they can respect my beliefs.

[soundninja12]

I can't date people who are really religious. Just can't deal with that, as an atheist, I have an issue with debating with religious people ><
I like fighting too much, and they're defensive, so I end up fighting :3

[reppy]

I went through a really argumentative atheist stage.  And then I mellowed out and found a comfortable middle ground for me.  It doesn't really matter to me if a person is super religious, as long as they don't try to force it on me and have a good heart.  I dated a Muslim girl that wore a hijab for like 6 years. ^_^;  It didn't work out, but not because of religious reasons.  She liked anime and video games and me so that made her the coolest person in the world to me. xD

[The_Geek]

I look for someone who is very mentally centered. If I can't have a decent conversation, then there is little doubt that I will not be able to stand their company. I'm a vegetarian sXe, so I try to stay within the circles of people who are as well. Generally, I just look for (As corny as it sounds) a spiritual connection. I don't really care about too much else.

[makichan]

My boyfriend and I clicked really well because of our interests. Back when I lived with my mom, he'd sneak over and we'd watch "Welcome to the NHK" and other anime shows together XD
But as our relationship progressed, I started to realize just how important my beliefs were and I became tired of being caught in between two worlds with him. It was like, he knew how I felt about God but he never once tried to understand where I was coming from.
Finally, I had to just have a serious heart-to-heart talk with him about how important it was to me. Kind of like a "I'm not going to force you, but I know that I'd like to share this experience with the person I love and if you don't want to, that's okay. I just don't know how long I can keep doing this" kind of thing. Once he saw how much it meant to me he decided to give it a try and, to my surprise, he's decided to keep going because he actually liked it. We've been together for nearly three years and it feels nice to finally share this side of myself with him.
So, while I felt that it didn't matter in the earlier stages of my relationship, I started to realize how important those beliefs were as we started getting more and more serious. That's why I feel that beliefs slowly become more important than interests as things progress. Interests seem to be more of the initial spark, I guess. At least, that's how I've experienced it.

[kylite]

In my case religion has really put a damper on past relationships. I am just not religious... *shrugs* I dont dislike it and everyone is entitled to their own belifs but I just do not partake

[reppy]

I look for someone who is very mentally centered. If I can't have a decent conversation, then there is little doubt that I will not be able to stand their company. I'm a vegetarian sXe, so I try to stay within the circles of people who are as well. Generally, I just look for (As corny as it sounds) a spiritual connection. I don't really care about too much else.

I'm not vegetarian but I am I guess straight edge.  Unfortunately, very few of my friends are.  All of them drink / do other stuff.  It's frustrating.  And I know I could never be with a girl that drank / did drugs / whatever.

Also, that's not corny .. that's what I'm looking for too. ^_^;

[Saki-the-cat]

I've never accually dated anyone before but i know what i like to look for. I mostly go for personallity when it comes to that sort of thing. I like more of a 'strong' attitude if that makes any sense. I guess i should say 'i don't want too tough and i don't want too shy of an attitude'. Also i try to find people who are into the same things as me (anime, videogames, hobbies, whatever). As for looks. I tend to like more 'cute' people (but realy i find most things in this world cute so that's not very hard for me xD). I also try and look for people who are around my height and/or weight (i want to be able to give someone a huge bear hug without worrying about seriously hurting them oAo).

[Teddy_Bearxx]

>.> emo children.... v.v

[Pots]

<sup>well for looks wise

must have:
shiny hair
nice teeth
and clear eyes

all the qualities you find in a good horse....</sup>

[camname21]

Easiest anwser is: They like to do things you like to do, but at the same time are their own person.


other anwsers include;


funny fun athletic fit smile eyes adventurous tough open truthful comfortable cuddly driven motivated spirited sexy brave understanding healthy kind

[Blackstar]

Personally I like a girl that I can have a intelligent conversation with. A girl is will to go outside and have some good fun and enjoy the beauty of the world

[StarryShay]

Attractive....physically? >n>
Someone taller, and older then me.
Who is s pretty boy, heh heh.
And personality wise, um, I think someone I can relate to, who has a cool personality. B')
Yeah.

[reppy]

I heard from DemonSpawn that you're really tall.  But then again, ... nevermind.  I'm too big to make a joke about her height. 

(Haha! I still snuck one in!)  XD

[StarryShay]

That I'm tall? ; 3 ;
Yeah, I guess.
It's terrible.
I'm 5'6". ; O ;